Nothing Left to Lose

Previously I have said that I would not discuss my federal case, as I didn’t want to taint
the hard work of my attorneys with my opinions; opinions that the US Government has a
record of taking out of context and using against me. That, and I wanted to protect the
many innocent people involved in this case, as they worked through their own appeals. But
all that changed last week.

I received a denial for the reconsideration En Banc, for my final appeal. I think En Banc
is lawyer-Latin for “last ditch” maybe. Either way, the fat lady has sung.
Uncharacteristically, the US 5th Circuit Court of Appeals didn’t even give us a reason as
to why they were denying the appeal. That kills any chance of me being able to argue the
decision in the unlikely event that the US Supreme Court would agree to hear my case. My
attorneys see no realistic path forward beyond Uncle Sam’s “because I said so” reasoning.
To be clear, I was forced into a plea agreement under duress, my wife was seriously ill,
and the US attorney wouldn’t agree to allow my wife to be released on bond unless I took
the plea. The US Marshals wouldn’t pay for her medical testing, and they wouldn’t allow
my family to pay for it ourselves. To sweeten the pot they offered her a 5-year cap on her
sentence if I was to take a plea. And they inferred that I would only get 22 years,
maximum. But in spite of the fact that I have multiple affidavits from multiple lawyers,
each that confirm I told them I was signing under duress, and in spite of the fact I
brought up the “deal” at my rearraignment, and ignoring the fact my lawyer himself said
he didn’t even have a chance to review any of our exculpatory evidence … they’ve denied
every single appeal, with no reasoning whatsoever.

In spite of that sad state of affairs, I’m honestly glad it’s over. Sure, I hate having
to live with a 30 year sentence for something I didn’t do. It kills me to miss the weddings
of my children, their graduations from high school and college, and the funerals of my
grandparents, and most likely my parents as well, eventually. But nothing hurts worse than
not being able to be there for my youngest son. There is however some closure in being free
of all the anxiety associated with the constant legal action, and living from motion to
motion. And of course, now I can finally tell the truth, without worrying about the
consequences.

I’ve oft written about the “nothing to lose” scenario in both my nonfiction and fictional
works. For me, it’s an epiphany, worthy of further exploration. It’s the perfection of pure
entropy injected into an otherwise orderly societal machine. People are controlled by the
constant fear of loss of freedom, possessions, or privilege. Truth is easily suppressed by
these fears. This scenario appears as an anomaly within the greater story, destroying any
ability of even the best machines (or humans) to predict the next action or event. There
just isn’t any freedom quite like having nothing left to lose. For me, it’s the ribbon on
the box of the doom and gloom my life has become. But for you, my beloved reader, it’s an
assurance that everything I have ever known will be disclosed without edit, censor, or even
remote consideration of privacy, legality, political correctness, or consequences.

This scenario will color all my future works, and direct the trajectory of my content,
starting with the launch of the Cybercrime section of this site. For years we’ve decorated
our “hacking” sites with the moniker “Network Security”, and hidden behind the phrase
“penetration testing”. To all those that cling to that holier than thou cloak of euphemism,
I have only one thing to say: cowards.

And so I open to you the red door to the darkness beyond; the underworld of high crimes
and misdemeanors committed between the laws of nations within the photons of our shared
telecommunication infrastructure.

I of course realize that the few antagonist of my life story will of course say “told you
so”, but I digress. I was just living the American dream in the suburbs when the FBI entry
team showed up at 4:AM pointing assault weapons at my children. This wasn’t my idea. And
to you Uncle Sam, my Dr. Frankenstein, you really should have seen this coming. Maybe you
should reevaluate whoever you subcontracted out the algorithm to for this scenario. If you
guys weren’t so focused on your immediate political aspirations, or if you weren’t in
– constant “cover up” mode, maybe you could have seen this 7 years into the future. But as
long as you are using the Criminal Justice System to catapult your problem cases into the
future with this very ineffective incapacitation model, versus true rehabilitation
opportunities… well, this is what happens.

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